Near Death Experiences
Every since I was in high school, I’ve been fascinated with death and dying. Raymond Moody, MD had just published a book called, Life After Life. Somehow it found its way to me, and I read it. I was hooked. Reading that book made death so intriguing.
Once I discovered that chaplaincy could connect me with people who might have had an NDE, I was drawn in. As a student, I worked in the Emergency Room and on the Cancer/Oncology floor. Both places gave me the opportunity to help those in crisis who were terrified of dying. I found this to be a natural fit for me. Others avoid such scary situations. But for me, it was how I best offered my gifts. I could listen and be compassionate and not feel like running from the room. And, the rewards were humbling. It’s such a privilege to be with those who are at their most vulnerable. All they really need is someone who is willing to stay with them and to listen. They will discover their own meaning and strength if given the chance. Some may need to be reassured repeatedly until they begin to calm down. But almost always, there will be a space where they begin to trust and to share their fears, doubts and experiences.
First, I became a hospice chaplain. I remember nurses who shared story after story of incredible things. One nurse said that when a 9 year-old was dying, his little 4 year-old brother was very involved. When the older brother died, the younger brother jumped up and down and pointed in the air saying, “Look, Andrew is flying!” He waved goodbye to his brother out the bedroom window. We began writing down these stories.*
Now, after having heard many similar stories, I believe that death is the beginning of a new way of being. Just before dying, I’ve seen people smile in recognition of someone. Others will reach upward and seem to be talking to someone. On the palliative care unit where I worked, we’d hear about “visitors” who came to help comfort the patient. We knew then that they were close to death.
Near death experiences almost always include seeing a bright light and feeling deep, unconditional love. Most people don’t want to “come back” but are told that they still have work to do on earth. After these experiences, the person loses any fear of dying.
The best book I’ve read recently is called, “After” by Bruce Guyser, MD. He was a true skeptic and a scientist who did amazing research to really try to debunk these NDEs. After almost five decades, he’s a changed man and now believes that we do “live on” after death. It’s a book that I’d love for my family of nerds to read.